Laughter

While caring for others and wanting to make the world a better place are two admirable and fine goals; right along with all of the many wonderful things that people do and how they think and what they feel, I was reminded today of how powerful a remedy, an aphrodisiac, a cure if you will, laughter is. Giggling, smiling, guffawing, chuckling, squealing, silently bent doubled over, tears streaming down your face; we've all been there and we've all appreciated what that moment of absolute abandon did for our psyches and probably for our health because let's face it, however much we laughed today or yesterday or last week, it wasn't enough. Even if you tripled the amount and you made a deliberate attempt to laugh at things that weren't even that funny, it still wouldn't be enough. We are entrenched in a time of civil, personal, societal, political, economic, religious turmoil. Of course, one might say that for any time throughout history particularly in the past century, but, for my generation, the forty somethings going on twenty somethings (once again get your mind out of the gutter, or hell, is it just me?), I notice very minutely the details about the people with whom I interact on a daily basis and, sadly, although many of them try, laughter does not seem to permeate as the primary source of their happiness or even of their contentment. And it is because, they are not happy. I completely understand this and I find it difficult to crack a smile when my mortgage payment comes due or you won't find me giggling when I walk outside to get in the car only to find that my right rear tire is flat. And you most certainly won't hear any sustained squealing as I mop the cat shit off the floor for the thousandth time this month. Whose idea were those fucking kittens anyway? Oh right, it was mine. But I digress... and no, I'm not smiling or giggling or laughing at how cute they are and frankly, I might hang one of them in the garage if I didn't think that it would somehow torment the children for the rest of their days. Then again, I may have already done some tormenting, okay, okay, you know I have, but moving on. Clearly, (not so much) my point is that aside from all of the difficulties that we are having in our modern day lives, how necesary and vital laughter is for all of us; a race of people inundated with technology and debt and just, responsibility.

I equate laughter with freedom; that ability to break the ties that have bound you to an idea or a person or a place. It's like that moment when you pick up a wrapped gift and you look at the shape, considering it, feeling it, turning it over in your hands, mentally making a list of things that it could be and then you hold it up to your ear and you shake it, gently at first but then a little more boldy, instantly declaring that you "know what it is!" But the thing is, it wasn't that you knew what it was, rather it was the excitement of the possibility that you were right! And ultimately, you didn't really care what it was, well, some of you may have, but overall, most of you were just so happy to have a gift in the first place and the rest of you were thrilled that it shifted inside of the box, indicating something that wasn't clothing related or a jacket. Who in the hell wants a jacket as a gift anyway? Even if you found an adorable one that you just "had to have" who in their right mind asks for a jacket? I'm completely lumping everyone into the same category here; I'm doing it and I make no apologies for doing it so fuck off if you think otherwise. But the moment when your eyes light up and you feel the corners of your mouth creeping up slowly toward the sky, the warm pearls of jubilance washing up through your diaphragm; it's that split second, when you cannot stop it, when the laughter radiates throughout your face and your chest and your mouth and your very soul when you feel like you have literally been given a gift. And for however long it goes on, however long it takes you to creep back into yourself, abandoning that moment of joy, you feel completely, wholly alive. Powerful to say the least.

(Jake has entered the domain of the blog and as he lays here next to me, I ask him...) "What did you find funny about the blog?" (I just read him what I'd written) and he said, "Nothing, but it was good and can you finish it later so that I can watch the Simpsons? You worthless people, stop reading my mother's blog, don't you have anything better to do?" Hmmm spoken like a true pain in the ass 13 year old who just felt compelled to pass gas while I sit here trying to examine something meaningful and important.

Today when walked down to the store, the group of old guys and, yes, they are old were sitting out having coffee as they do every morning and I always stop and chat with them, back to that comfort level with men I suppose, but also because they are good, smart, funny men who say really significant and often really offensive things which I find utterly amusing. You have to have a thick skin to hang out with that pack. Mike, who works down the way was standing there, taking the brunt of it when I walked up and one of the guys goes, "Hey Yvette, we were just saying how we think Mike is gay." Mike is not gay, in fact, he's happily married with an adorable little boy, but in the moment, you've got to run with it so I turn and say, "Yeah Mike I always thought that you were gay" and Mike just looks like someone punched him in the stomach, but then he laughs, knowing that everyone is just "busting his balls." He's a good sport... but then it was my turn. Mr. M turns to me and says, "Hey Yvette you look really good, still running?" and I said, "Yeah, thanks, but you know, that's implying that I've lost a lot of weight if I look good now" and he doesn't miss a beat, he fires back, "Yeah I know, you were a lardass before" and I see Tim, my husband of 17 years, my supposed best friend and defender and he is doubled over laughing, tears almost coming out of his eyes. What am I going to say? I would have told him to go fuck himself, but that may have been a tad disrespectful so I smiled and walked away as they all laughed and I laughed too. What are you going to do? I will say this though, if I could find more laughter in the silly things and the unimportant, my life might be warmer and fuller and my family might not have to walk on eggshells as much...

One of the cartoonists in Playboy this month drew two snow creatures sitting next to one another, really hideous snow creatures and it's obvious that they just had sex and the one says to the other one, "Was it abominable for you too?" I laughed so hard I got a cramp in my stomach. From that type of humor, one can certainly assume that my meter for what is "funny" is probably very low on the scale for sophistication, but you know, I think Chris Rock is funny and I think that Denis Leary is hilarious. I love it when children tell jokes wrong and when people trip and fall and then laugh, checking to see if anyone saw them do it. I find South Park ridiculously offensive, but I can't stop watching it. I get why Bart Simpson is an icon for teenagers and adults too. Tim was shaving his face the other morning and so, I jumped up on the counter in front of him and gave him the old two eybrow lift, CLEARLY indicating what I wanted. He looked at me and smiled and I thought I had him when he moved and said, "Yvette, I really have to get to that meeting" and then... HE LEFT TO GO TO THE MEETING. But you know, I laughed because what the hell else am I gonna do? Sulk, suffer, get out the vibrator (pause for reaction) and for those of you who are saying, Yvette, too much information, I told you, I don't care what any of you think. I write this for myself and if you feel compelled to read it, do so at your own peril because I refuse to censor or filter my thoughts because yours are rated PG-13. I make no apologies, so laugh along with me, laugh at me or delete this blog from your world, but know this, for whatever I say, there are 20 things that I'm NOT saying and don't you wish, right about now, that I'd say them...

Lastly, having a sense of humor doesn't mean that you get it, doesn't mean that you tell jokes or stories better than anyone else. A sense of humor means that you can laugh at yourself, at a situation, at other people when it is often inappropriate and even, unwanted. People are ridiculous, stupid, ignorant and fucking hilarious. I include myself in this "grouping" by adding that I find things funny that no one else does and often I am standing in a room laughing by myself, at myself, wishing that somebody got what the hell I was trying to say in the first place...

Nick: "Mom, Mom, Knock Knock"
Me: "Who's there?"
Nick: "Ya"
Me: "Ya Who?"
Nick: "Yahoo, Get it, like a cowboy, get it mom?" grips his stomach laughing hysterically before exiting the room.

Yes Nick I get it, I get it all and then some, maybe that's part of the problem. Enjoy today and do me a favor, try to laugh at something; it really is contagious... :)